Foreplay to a woman is NOT groping, pleading, a little petting, 30 seconds of oral and a few minutes of heavy breathing before switching positions to prove you're throwing in some variety.
Nor is it a formula of helping with the dishes in exchange for sex 15 minutes later.
Foreplay for a woman is about the 'being' of a man and begins the moment the previous act of sex ends.
It's curling around her and holding her rather than rolling over and going to sleep.
It's getting her a glass of water, a towel, bowl of fruit or cup of tea.
It's the habit of making her coffee in the morning, joining her in the shower or letting her sleep in while you make the kids breakfasts and pack the lunches.
It's the kiss at the door that lingers and the grab he always sneaks in that says he finds her irresistible and can't wait to get back.
It's the text he sends from work to say he was reminded of her when he passed the little Vietnamese place she loves so much.
It's the house cleaner he surprises her with the day before her parents come to visit.
It's the way he stops to help someone stranded at the side of the road.
It's the way he drops a project and spends time with his son or takes his daughter shopping for a new pair of shoes.
It's the way he notices the moment his woman walks through the door, or across the room and how he appreciates her small gestures of love.
It's in the way he listens, how he respects her intuition and embraces her emotions, especially the days she can't explain why she's so upset.
It's the way he makes her feel safe and holds her rather than stepping away when he doesn't know what to do.
It's the way he looks at her and says, "I don't know what you're feeling right now, but I'm here until I know you've got what you need."
***Total average time per day needed by a man to fulfill the list as described: Averages 15 minutes a day.
BENEFITS FOR MEN WHO DO THIS:
The odds are unfairly in a man’s favor to find a woman who's been waiting to experience this her whole life and will lavish you with every personal and sexual response when she encounters you.
Want to know why guys can't figure out that the way into your bed is through proving they care about your heart?
Why don't they call or text when they say you're important to them?
Can't tell the difference between a guy that's Emotionally Unavailable and one who's just not great at expressing his feelings?
Wonder what happened in the first few dates when everything was going so well and then he vanished?
Got a guy who used to be super attentive, but now he's distant and won't let you in?
Are you Online Dating and getting little response, too much response or the wrong kind of response?
Are you feeling stuck and wondering why no man has made you feel worth choosing and committing to?
Did he break up with you, but he's sending you mixed signals about whether it's done or he's still interested?
Maybe you're wondering if men can actually be exclusive or what the signs are that he's actually commitment ready?
Next month I'm going to provide 6 weeks live Q & A for the most intense and personal questions you have about men. We'll be meeting every week twice in the same day to make sure everyone has an opportunity to be on in their time zone.
All the calls will be recorded and put in the private group to review and these are going to be answers to questions that either have never been answered, or that men have danced around because they were afraid to reveal their secrets.
My commitment is to share the truth about what men are thinking, why their truth is what it is, and how by understanding it you can avoid the ones who aren't ready and show up in a way that's irresistible for the ones who are.
And I'll share one little thing that might surprise you right here... it was easier for me to understand what's going on in women than it was to dig into the truth about men. 99.99% of men don't know their truth because they're so terrified of failing women and themselves.
I can hardly describe how many uncomfortable conversations this process has taken with Jenn and female clients to get to the bottom of what men are afraid of, why we REALLY do and say the things we do and to be candidly honest about things that are frankly awkward or embarrassing.
The answers you'll hear in this series are going to be WAY beyond any kind of Guy Spy information because the depth of truth that will be revealed is so vulnerable it's taken me months of agonizing to decide to share.
This is truth at a level that part of me didn't even want to talk about because I didn't know what Jenn would think. No guy has ever spoken it out loud, not even with other men. We've just accepted that if women knew the real truth you wouldn't ever accept us.
As I've risked sharing these things I've discovered that while you may be shocked, and that the average woman can't believe what men are really afraid of or motivated by, that conscious women CRAVE to genuinely understand men and don't just want to turn them into domesticated companions.
(FYI - That's one of men's biggest fears, that women are waiting until we commit so you can get us locked in, dependent on your approval, take away our freedom and turn us into something that more resembles one of your girlfriends than what makes us feel like a man).
After thousands of generations of men and women fumbling through relationships because the best we've been able to do is to laugh at how little we understand about each other, now is a unique chance for you to get a first person look into the way a man's mind works that will make you an expert on men so knowledgeable it will be spooky to men.
DON'T think about doing this if you're highly reactive. There will definitely be information I sometimes reveal that will trigger you and you have to be able to share your reactions to these things that uncover old wounds constructively.
This is for women who love and embrace men and want to understand the differences, NOT for anyone who is still angry at men for the pain you feel they're responsible for. You must have a sense of centeredness to go through this and I will be asking everyone who wants to participate to describe why they believe they're capable to be responsible for this vulnerability in men before being approved.
That's only fair in any sharing relationship - both parties must be equally committed to the vulnerability of sharing their truth, so I need to know you can be vulnerable enough in the process to be trusted with this truth that men have been afraid of ever speaking out loud.
For more information on our books and courses that cover this in more detail, or to book a one on one call, send a message through the “Contact” page.
Graham R White